I'm manic depressive, or bi polar. i was more than happy when I woke up today. I haven't anything to complain about. I had a good week. Drea wants to chill. yet as soon as i talk to someone i compeatly lose my emotions. I'm not sure why. Its drving me crazy.

Heart of a Gambler, Mind of a Hustler, Soul of a Warrior

What does it take to be a gambler, well you first have to have the heart of a gambler, it has to be in the blood, it takes something special to be able to put every dime you have on what you believe is the right move to make you a winner at the table and in life.

You have to have no fear, no fear of losing because you have to believe that the move you are making is the right move and if not, you have to believe you can make the come back if you lose and live with that decision.Sometimes, you have to call for all you got, knowing that you are behind, but have faith, that you can catch up.

You have to have the mind of a hustler, hustlers are always thinking how can I make that cash, how can I get that money. You need to have a mind of a hustler, to create a system for getting that cash and the mind of a hustler to know how to get the cash. For some it is in the blood, you either have it or you don't.

Heart of a gambler, the mind of a hustler and the soul of a warrior, these are the things it takes to be a gambler.

You have to have passion when you play this game of gambling, no matter what you use to do it with, whatever game you play, you must play it with passion.

Can you take all that you have and place it on one bet to make life changing money? I can!

A well written article. The courage to be able to put your life on the line is something that is important to anyone. What do I believe in?

In a world where sex is a commodity. Do where do you stand? On one cliff you have those who believe that sex is a conservative and private. Things that should be keep behind closed doors and not talked about. On the other cliff you find those who are not afraid to talk about it where keeping an open mind and being able to talk about it is important. I can only be who I am, but where do I stand?

In the mirror I see a blank canvass.
A Young man. Not quite a boy or a teen
Not quite a Man grizzled with wisdom
He is not in shape. Nor is he out of shape.
He is not fat nor skinny.

In the mirror I see.
someone who can do anything.
someone who does nothing.

This is how I see it.

Being a nice guy sucks. Its hard to understand why women like bad guys, its all hard to understand why women want somthing else. I don't understand alot of things and women is one of them. I don't know how to pick up a woman I'm not really sure that i know how come she didn't like me. I guess i should ask her next time. I guess teh answer that im not looking for is the "your not my type" thats such a bull answer . I want somthing more specific. But if she says that it proves my point that she don't dig asian guys. Just like in the movies. she sure does watch alot of movies though. It was my mistake . I need to re dedicate myself to what I do and what im good at. finish up school and walk away from everything. Thats all I can really do now is just walk away . concentrate of who I am.

Ever say something really really stupid and wish you could take those precious few seconds back to not say those words. I just had that moment. The girl i liked asked me for a favor and thanked me with i love you. Why oh why did i say those exact same words back. Man i feel like goof. LOL you could call my goofy retarted waht have you man im such a dork and an idiot with girls. Why do these rules need to be so complicated. These courting women should not be this difficult let alone strict on rules. Blah so i think i will be depressed very very soon for a very very long time. once agian i screwed things up with a really great person. I need to learn from my mistakes not be paranoid and just let thigns flow. Just not let words flow out of my mouth.

What exactly is a date? I'm not really sure anymore. So yesterday I thought it was an awsome day date sorta. Like 95% awsome. Had a great lunch at yard house with an awsome girl. But the other thing about it is im not sure it was a romantic date. 2 friending haning out haing lunch and a movie dons't constitute a date nessisarly. So was it a date? I'm not sure. It was fun to have lunch and talk with her though. So lets start with, Lunch at yard house pretty good. Next cool movie deffeinatly, maybe. Thats the one with Ryan Renyolds or somthing. So yeah pretty neat movie for a Febuary movie. It was pretty cool having coffee and getting to know her. but im not really convinced that this is a situation that i can't not be happy with. Im really happy witht heh way the day was but im not sure its a romantic date which i guess im ok with. But i suppose last nights dream was somthing of a weird dream cuse all i dremed about was making out with someone. a person with no face. I wonder what that means. Im not really sure. its been so long that i've done that that i feel like i need pratice. Ughhh i m soo confused. It was kinda intersting finding someone who feels the same way about picking someone up at a bar. FInally i have somoene that i can share my thoughts about that with. blah someone is here and i don't wanna write anymore