Isn't it a weird double standard as a father that you want your son to be a Ladies man, but on the other hand you Want your daughter to be a prude? 18 years from now what do you say to your daughter brings home guy after guy? But at the same time if your son brings home girl after girl do you pat him on the back?

In dealing with a mother, aunt, and grandmother who all to some degree are all hypochondriac it is at times difficult to deal with their anxis and theories. They tend to bring about every problem for everyone onto them selfs'. With this being said, I am at times a hypochondriac, germaphobe, deprecating, and death anxious. It can make at times hard to go out, the mental side of it all being that it affects physical body more than it should. Fear of going out fear of humiliated fear in general all lead to becoming a person who is a shut in. That prefers to hide behind a computer screen.

It hurts, There's a pain in my chest
A deep gaping hole in my chest, The darkness fills my body and my soul
My soul feels like its leaking out
The feeling that are supposed to be there aren't there.
The task in front is not too big but it seems like nothing I do
Even if i look forward to something its just disappointment with
What if's

I'm searching for tranquility, I want balance, Would i be happy if i left it all behind.
Take my shot, do my thing, grind it out?
or Do I stay in mediocrity and remain content with being lucky.
Lucky that my family has some money. I'm lucky that I don't have to pay rent, I'm lucky that my parents will support me in what ever I do.

What do I do? Should i stay or should I go.
Life is too short to not do what you like
I'm just so tired of grinding.